The Book: Inana's Descent to the Netherworld
The Author: Lost to the mists of time, but fertility cultists were probably involved.
This text: This one, a consolidated multi-source translation from what seems to be one of the coolest sites on the internet.
Price: Nothin'.
Inana's Descent to the Netherworld
So Inana goes down into the underworld. It's not actually stated why she goes down into the underworld. She says it's to observe the funeral rites for her sister's husband, but since her sister guards the gate to the underworld this may be a ruse to be allowed through. Later, some divinities declare that she was seeking the divine powers of the underworld, but they're trying to weasel out of their godly duties.
Inana never actually says.
Whatever. It is not important, because the song actually starts with her abandoning everything: heaven, earth, her job, her temples - everything.
She gathers the seven divine powers and gets dressed. Power dressed. A turban. Beads. The garment of ladyship. Sexy mascara (no, really, it's called 'let a man come, let him come'). A sexy breastplate (called 'come, man, come'). Rings. And a lapis lazuli measuring rod and a measuring line.
Most importantly she takes her sidekick Nincubura. Nincubura's role is pretty important: firstly, she's to conduct the funeral rites, which involve a certain amount of self-flagellation, both public and secret. Then, when Inana has been in the underworld for long enough, she's to ask the god Enlil to bring her back. If he won't help, then go to Nanna's temple and ask him. And if that doesn't work, try Enki, who has the life-giving herb and the life-giving water. These gods aren't chosen at random: they're Inana's fathers. Well, Enki's her mother's father. But they're expected to be looking out for her interests.
'And after Enki?'Inana arrives at Ganzer, and is met by Neti, doorman of the underworld. She asks to be let through, and he asks why. She says, it's to pay respects to her brother-in-law. Neti goes to ask his mistress, Inana's sister Erec-ki-gala. Erec-ki-gala is skeptical of Inana's stated reasons, and tells Neti to bolt the seven gates. He is to let Inana through one gate at a time, and each time she is to crawl through and have one of her divine accoutrements taken away.
'After Enki I'm out of divine ancestors.'
This he does. Inana is all, My turban, really? and Dude, my beads? and Neti is all, Hey, rites of the underworld, lady, you want to mess with the rites of the underworld? Inana arrives in Erec-ki-gala's throne room naked but unbowed, and kicks her sister off the throne and sits on it herself. This offends the judges of the underworld deeply, and they give her the death glare. And then the anger speech. And then the shouting of guilt.
Then they hang her corpse on a hook.
Three days later, Nicubura goes into action. She lacerates herself. She laments her mistress in the ruined houses, in the temples. She dresses in mourning. And she fronts up to Enlil's temple: Please don't let your daughter be killed in the underworld!
Enlil is not happy, figuring she's gone there to steal the divine powers of the underworld, and says, Yeah, look, nobody really comes back from the underworld.
So she goes to Nanna's temple in Urim: Please don't let your daughter be killed in the underworld!
Nanna is likewise unhappy, and likewise says, Yeah, look, nobody really comes back from the underworld.
So she goes to Enki's temple in Eridug: Please don't let your daughter be killed in the underworld!
Enki, at least, is worried. He's proud of his granddaughter and doesn't want her to die in the underworld. He immediately creates two spirit creatures, and gives them the live-giving herb and the live-giving water. Then he sends them off with instructions: they are to go immediately to Erec-ki-gala's palace, sneak through the gates of the underworld, present themselves in the throne room, wait until she complains about her health, and sympathise with her. This is apparently not something that Erec-ki-gala is used to, and she will offer rewards. The spirit-beings must swear her to providing a reward, but they are not under any circumstances to accept rewards of, say, a river full of water or a field full of grain. They are instead to ask for the corpse that's hanging on a hook. After that, it's a simple matter of sprinkling on the life-giving plant and water, and restoring Inana back to life.
An advantage of being one of the elder Babylonian gods is that your foresight is pretty good, and events transpire exactly as Enki predicted. But just as Inana is about to re-enter the land of the living, the judges of the underworld accost her and tell her that people do not just leave the underworld, missy, and that there are rules for this sort of thing. Inana can go on one condition: that someone else is sent back in her place. Two demons are sent with her to make sure this happens, plus a gaggle of little demons. None of them are nice demons, though it's mostly that they are boring people who don't enjoy anything and can't get dates than any actual cruelty.
The first person they meet is Nincubura. Inana says no, not this one. She points out all the self-inflicted mourning injuries, and the grieving garments, and all the praying and god-begging that Nincubura has been doing.
Fine, say the demons. Just fine.
The next person they meet is Cara. The demons are happy to take this one. No way in ... well, wherever, says Inana. This is Cara, who does my nails, does my hair, sings to me. And besides, he's clearly been mourning, because no way would he dress this badly otherwise.
Fine, say the demons. Just fine.
They move on, and come across Lulal, Inana's son. Not this one, says Inana, he's pretty reliable and anyway, he's dressed in mourning clothes like a good boy. No.
Fine, say the demons. But the next one...
The next one is Inana's husband Dumuzid. Dumuzid is seated on a throne and wearing a splendid robe.
'I notice your husband isn't dressed in mourning.'Now Inana gives Dumuzid the death glare, and the anger speech, and the shouting of guilt. She tells the demons to take him away. Dumuzid has divine connections of his own, however, and prays to Utu, his brother-in-law. Utu turns him into a pile of snakes, who escape.
'I notice that exact same thing.'
The translation gets pretty fragmentary at this point, but Inana is more upset by the loss of her husband than she thought she'd be, and mourns. A fly helps Inana find her husband and is, in return, blessed with a destiny that will forever involve beer-houses and taverns. Dumuzid ends up time-sharing his sentence with his sister, so that each of them is in the underworld for half the year. Pomegranates are not involved at any point.
And the translation ends with a prayer to Erec-ki-gala, because obviously.
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