The Myth: Viking Sagas! Blood! Magic! Snow! Violence! Seafaring! Vicious, vicious poetry!
The Book: Sagas of Warrior-Poets
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth century.
This text: Paperback anthology from a 1997 translation by various scholars
Price: Well, I paid $16.95 according to the sticker. (Penguin
Classics. Amazon has an etext which is slightly cheaper, and there are
probably earlier translations around.)
The Saga of Hallfred Troublesome-Poet
So Hallfred is in love with Kolfinna Avaldadottir, but isn't ready for the commitment of marriage. Kolfinna's father Avaldi therefore arranges to marry Kolfinna to Gris, who has been as far afield as Constantinople and may have been a Varangian Guard. Hallfred complains to Kolfinna, who tells him that he's had his chance. Gris and his father tell Hallfred that they don't want him sniffing around Kolfinna any more. Hallfred's foster father and his actual father agree, and Hallfred is sent overseas.
Hallfred befriends Earl Hakon of Norway with poetry and becomes a succesful trader, staying well away from the north of Iceland where Kolfinna is. Then Hakon dies and Olaf Tryggvason - also known as St. Olaf - is now king, with a new religion and new laws. Olaf demands that Hallfred and his crew convert. Hallfred, canny merchant that he his, agrees on two conditions: that Olaf never forsake him, and that the king himself act as sponsor in his baptism.
Hallfred stays with the king for some years, composing vaguely pagan poems that Olaf doesn't really want to hear, and gains the nickname 'Troublesome-Poet' during this period. Slowly and reluctantly, Hallfred gives up his poetic references to the old gods at Olaf's insistence. Still, when Hallfred's rival, the courtier Kalf, accuses him of being a secret pagan, it's all a bit too plausible, and only the king's baptism oaths prevent him from exiling Hallfred. Instead, he gives Hallfred the task of blinding Thorleif the Wise, an influential pagan hold-out in up-country Norway.
Hallfred makes his way onto Thorleif's farm, in secret initially, but Thorleif has dreamed of his coming and rumbles him. They fight, and Hallfred rips out one of Thorleif's eyes. Thorleif offers him money and gifts and favour if Hallfred spares him. Hallfred refuses the gifts but agrees to grant mercy off his own bat. On the way home, he stops in at Kalf's place, and takes his eye, too. He presents both eyes to King Olaf, who notices the difference and wants to send Hallfred back to Thorleif for his other eye. Hallfred refuses, but says he's happy to go back to Kalf's place. The king says it's probably better if he doesn't.
Hallfred continues to travel but not trade, as a shipwreck loses him worldly goods. A wealthy but elderly man named Audgisl hires him to accompany his caravan through dangerous territory. They run afoul of a bandit named Onund, who kills Audgisl and is killed in turn by Hallfred. Hallfred continues the journey to Audgisl's home, and on the way he is attacked by another man named Bjorn, and kills him. Audgisl's kin put him to trial for the murder of Bjorn, but on discovering that he was a trusted friend of Audgisl and following him to recover the body, they find in his favour and award him Onund's accumulated booty. Hallfred falls in love with Audgisl's widow, named Ingibjorg, and settles down for some years. They have two fine sons, Audgisl and Hallfred, Jr.
During this time, Hallfred's only religious observance is to make the sign of the cross over his beer. King Olaf appears to him in a dream and berates him for lapsing in his faith. The king's fetch demands that Hallfred bring his family to meet him. They do, and Ingibjorg and the kids are baptised.
Ingibjorg dies shortly afterwards, and Hallfred becomes homesick for Iceland. He sends the boys off to fosterings, and takes some men to Gris' homestead. The first thing he does is reacquaint himself with Kolfinna, and spending the night with her. He tells her that he has heard a great deal of scandalous poetry about Gris, and asks if she had written them. She denies it, and grows more offended with each verse, and more so when he starts composing his own. Gris hears about this liaison and the poetry, and he and his men try to kill Hallfred. They fail. Gris continues to demand compensation, in the form of Hallfred's royally-bestowed jewellery. Hallfred scoffs and refuses, and continues to compose satirical poetry.
Now very highly offended, Gris prepares a lawsuit. Hallfred has a weak case, which becomes weaker when Gris' kinsman kills his cousin, the lawyer. He opts for the 'challenge the opponent to a duel' defence, available in Viking courts, but the recently deposed King Olaf appears to him in a dream and tells him that he doesn't exactly have right - and therefore God - on his side. Hallfred cancels the duel and asks for a settlement, even though it's likely to go against him. The judge - Hallfred's uncle - balances up the murders, the kisses and the poems, and orders Hallfred to pay a fine, more of his royal jewellery.
Hallfred leaves his farm, with the vague intention of avenging King Olaf by killing the Earl Eirik. Dream-Olaf appears and tells him that this is a bad plan, and that he should instead reconcile himself to the Earl through poetry. Eirik's men capture him and he takes a lunge at the earl, and he is sentenced to death. Thorleif the Wise requests that Hallfred be spared, in recognition of his earlier clemency. The two become friends.
Hallfred's adventuring days are now largely over, though he does travel briefly with Gunnlaug Serpent-Tongue, hero of the next Saga, and they compare warrior-poet notes. Hallfred dies at sea as he is taking his family back to Iceland one last time. His coffin washes up in Iona, where the abbot's servants plunder his remains. Dream-Olaf berates the abbot for his poor treatment of the poet, and the monks recover Hallfred's body for Christian burial, making altar goods from his treasures - the last of his king-bestowed gold.
And here the saga of Hallfred ends.
Next: Gunnlaug Serpent-Tongue.
Monday, 29 December 2014
Tuesday, 23 December 2014
Blood and Poems: Kormak's Saga
The Myth: Viking Sagas! Blood! Magic! Snow! Violence! Seafaring! Vicious, vicious poetry!
The Book: Sagas of Warrior-Poets
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth century.
This text: Paperback anthology from a 1997 translation by various scholars
Price: Well, I paid $16.95 according to the sticker. (Penguin Classics. Amazon has an etext which is slightly cheaper, and there are probably earlier translations around.)
I've had this on my shelf for some years, and had never got around to reading it. It doesn't quite fit into my free-texts-from-history ethos, but turned out to be such fun that I couldn't pass it up.
So the book is a (Penguin) collection of a number of Icelandic sagas, of the warrior-poet genre. The sagas are prose shot through with bits of verse. This genre deals with love triangles, revenge cycles and general bad behaviour. The protagonists are generally unsympathetic: quixotic, vain and violent, although to be fair so is nearly everyone else. One of the sagas is actually called 'The Saga of Hallfred Troublesome-Poet'. Because the protagonists are warrior-poets, there's as much slander and litigation as duelling and violence. As crimes deserving compensation go, 'you killed my cousin!' is roughly on a par with 'you wrote shitty poetry and said it was mine!'
Kormak's Saga is the first in the book, and sets the scene pretty well. Kormak meets and falls in love with Steingerd, fails to marry her, and then continues to pursue her long after everyone else has lost interest, including her. Kormak's brother, Thorgils, follows loyally while constantly pointing out how stupid Kormak is being. Everyone else is all, "Are you still going on about this?" Halfway through, Steingerd herself tells him to piss off. Kormak comes across as being a complete dick, and it's possible that the Viking moral is: 'Mouthy poets is trouble.'
It's pretty great.
Kormak's Saga
Kormak and Thorgils are Viking brothers, sons of heroes. Kormak is in love with Steingerd, but her father, Thorkel, disapproves. This disapproval manifests as him trying to have Kormak killed; two sons of the of the sorceress Thorveig attempt the deed, fail, and are killed. Kormak confronts Thorveig and tells him that he has no intention of providing compensation for her sons, and tells her to leave town. Thorveig responds with a curse: Kormak will never enjoy Steingerd's love.
This turns out to be a remarkably subtle curse, playing out over Kormak's entire life, although another possibility is that it is completely ineffectual and Kormak is just a dick.
Regardless, Kormak goes to a lot of effort to win over Thorkel, and eventually the latter agrees to let him marry Steingerd.
And Kormak doesn't turn up.
Thorkel is furious. He pretty quickly arranges to marry Steingerd to champion duelist Bersi. Steingerd sends her kinsman Narsi to tell Kormak about the marriage. Narsi does, and Kormak hits him. Thorgils suggests that this is perhaps an overreaction; Kormak agrees, and they get the full story of the wedding feast out of Narsi.
Kormak and Thorgils arrive in pursuit. Thorgils finds an old boat in a barn, which Thorveig offers to hire to them at an exorbitant price. Thorgils grumbles, but Kormak says that he's on a mission for love and doesn't want to piss about with pocket change. Thorgils pays up and they set off across the ford.
The boat sinks.
Kormak's mother Dalla tells him he's an idiot, and if he's going to fight a champion duelist he should probably borrow her friend Skeggi's magic sword. Skeggi initially refuses, but after an implied intervention by Dalla, relents and teaches Kormak the ritual necessary to activate the sword's magic.
The duel goes badly for Bersi: a blow from Steinar glances off his magic shield, and chops off his buttock. Bersi's wound heals badly until a friend recovers the healing stone, but Steingerd considers him disgraced, calling him 'Arse-Bersi' and divorcing him. Thorkel attempts to recover Steingerd's dowry, and Bersi kills him.
Shortly after leaving Bersi, Steingerd meets and marries a tin-smith called Thorvald. Kormak finds out and follows them to Thorvald's homestead. He tells Steingerd that he's a bit disappointed that she has married again, and she tells him that she hopes he is eaten by trolls.
Thorvald challenges Kormak to another duel; this time Kormak doesn't bother with Thordis' protection, and ends the duel with a blow that breaks his opponent's shoulder. Thorvard forfeits another gold ring. Kormak continues to harass Steingerd, and is seen kissing her in public, twice. Thorvald demands compensation, and is given the two rings back. Kormak and Thorgils leave town, and take service with the King of Norway.
Later, Steingerd asks to accompany Thorvald on his travels. This brings them into range of Kormak again, who continues to press his attentions on Steingerd. Then Thorvald loses his ships, goods and wife to Viking raiders. When Kormak hears about this he sets off in pursuit, rescuing Steingerd and killing the raiders. Thorvald says that, due to his heroism, perhaps Kormak should take Steingerd with him. Steingerd vehemently refuses. Kormak puts this down to Thorveig's curse, and gallantly says that he doesn't think it would work out.
And there this saga ends.
Next: A troublesome poet.
The Book: Sagas of Warrior-Poets
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth century.
This text: Paperback anthology from a 1997 translation by various scholars
Price: Well, I paid $16.95 according to the sticker. (Penguin Classics. Amazon has an etext which is slightly cheaper, and there are probably earlier translations around.)
I've had this on my shelf for some years, and had never got around to reading it. It doesn't quite fit into my free-texts-from-history ethos, but turned out to be such fun that I couldn't pass it up.
So the book is a (Penguin) collection of a number of Icelandic sagas, of the warrior-poet genre. The sagas are prose shot through with bits of verse. This genre deals with love triangles, revenge cycles and general bad behaviour. The protagonists are generally unsympathetic: quixotic, vain and violent, although to be fair so is nearly everyone else. One of the sagas is actually called 'The Saga of Hallfred Troublesome-Poet'. Because the protagonists are warrior-poets, there's as much slander and litigation as duelling and violence. As crimes deserving compensation go, 'you killed my cousin!' is roughly on a par with 'you wrote shitty poetry and said it was mine!'
Kormak's Saga is the first in the book, and sets the scene pretty well. Kormak meets and falls in love with Steingerd, fails to marry her, and then continues to pursue her long after everyone else has lost interest, including her. Kormak's brother, Thorgils, follows loyally while constantly pointing out how stupid Kormak is being. Everyone else is all, "Are you still going on about this?" Halfway through, Steingerd herself tells him to piss off. Kormak comes across as being a complete dick, and it's possible that the Viking moral is: 'Mouthy poets is trouble.'
It's pretty great.
Kormak's Saga
Kormak and Thorgils are Viking brothers, sons of heroes. Kormak is in love with Steingerd, but her father, Thorkel, disapproves. This disapproval manifests as him trying to have Kormak killed; two sons of the of the sorceress Thorveig attempt the deed, fail, and are killed. Kormak confronts Thorveig and tells him that he has no intention of providing compensation for her sons, and tells her to leave town. Thorveig responds with a curse: Kormak will never enjoy Steingerd's love.
This turns out to be a remarkably subtle curse, playing out over Kormak's entire life, although another possibility is that it is completely ineffectual and Kormak is just a dick.
Regardless, Kormak goes to a lot of effort to win over Thorkel, and eventually the latter agrees to let him marry Steingerd.
And Kormak doesn't turn up.
Thorkel is furious. He pretty quickly arranges to marry Steingerd to champion duelist Bersi. Steingerd sends her kinsman Narsi to tell Kormak about the marriage. Narsi does, and Kormak hits him. Thorgils suggests that this is perhaps an overreaction; Kormak agrees, and they get the full story of the wedding feast out of Narsi.
'Thorgils! Bersi has taken my beloved Steingerd to wife!'Kormak sets off in pursuit of the wedding party, accompanied by the reluctant Thorgils. Bersi travels through Thorveig's farm, and she gives him a magic shield and lends him a boat. She then has her people stave out the bottoms of the rest of her boats, so that Kormak can't follow.
'That's true, Kormak, but when you didn't turn up to your wedding, everyone kind of assumed that you'd lost interest.'
'(mumble)'
'What?'
'I said it isn't easy, being a poet!'
Kormak and Thorgils arrive in pursuit. Thorgils finds an old boat in a barn, which Thorveig offers to hire to them at an exorbitant price. Thorgils grumbles, but Kormak says that he's on a mission for love and doesn't want to piss about with pocket change. Thorgils pays up and they set off across the ford.
The boat sinks.
'Boat's sinking, Kormak.'They go back to their horses and eventually catch up to Bersi, who has now joined up with several of his men. Kormak claims, against quite a lot of reason, that Bersi has abducted Steingerd.
'Shut up, Thorgils.'
'Bersi, I shall have my vengeance!'Bersi, who had no particular beef against Kormak, says, no, he's properly married, and asks Kormak if he would like his sister Helga as a wife instead. Kormak dithers, but eventually decides that, no, he would rather fight Bersi in a duel. He names a time and a place. Thorgils tells him he's an idiot, and they head home. Kormak stops briefly to talk to Steingerd, who says that while she had no particular wish to marry Bersi, Kormak is in fact a trouble-maker and a bit of a dick.
'Kormak? What the hell for?'
'You married my beloved Steingerd!'
'Dude. I heard you didn't turn up to your wedding because you'd lost interest.'
'It isn't easy being a poet!'
'Steingerd, I'm quite disappointed that you'd marry someone else.'Kormak leaves her with some love poetry, saying that he loves her so much that he's willing to ride his horse to death for her.
'Wasn't exactly my idea, Kormak, but when you didn't turn up to our wedding, I kind of assumed that you'd lost interest.'
'It isn't easy being a poet.'
Kormak's mother Dalla tells him he's an idiot, and if he's going to fight a champion duelist he should probably borrow her friend Skeggi's magic sword. Skeggi initially refuses, but after an implied intervention by Dalla, relents and teaches Kormak the ritual necessary to activate the sword's magic.
'Right, Kormak, you understand the ritual you need for the magic sword Skofnung? That I'm only lending you because your mother is a close friend?'Kormak screws up the magic ritual and the sword refuses to fight for him. It screeches, it howls, and it cuts off the tip of Bersi's sword, which cuts open Kormak's thumb. Blood on the dueling ground is a forfeit; Kormak loses. Kormak takes the sword back to Skeggi, singing whiny poems about the stupid sword.
'Yeah, basically.'
'We're going to regret this.'
'Skeggi, your magic sword sucks! I lost the duel in the shittiest way possibly!'Kormak asks his cousin Steinar, a champion duelist, to pay the dueling fee to Bersi. Bersi offers to heal Kormak's wound with his magic healing stone, but Kormak refuses. At the Althing, Bersi inadvertently insults Steinar, who says that he was going to pay Kormak's forfeit, but now offers double-or-nothing. Bersi accepts. Steinar taunts Bersi into a swimming race as well, and during the race tears off his healing stone.
'Did you remember the ritual?'
'Well, maybe I didn't remember every single little tiny syllable...'
The duel goes badly for Bersi: a blow from Steinar glances off his magic shield, and chops off his buttock. Bersi's wound heals badly until a friend recovers the healing stone, but Steingerd considers him disgraced, calling him 'Arse-Bersi' and divorcing him. Thorkel attempts to recover Steingerd's dowry, and Bersi kills him.
Shortly after leaving Bersi, Steingerd meets and marries a tin-smith called Thorvald. Kormak finds out and follows them to Thorvald's homestead. He tells Steingerd that he's a bit disappointed that she has married again, and she tells him that she hopes he is eaten by trolls.
"Steingerd, I'm quite disappointed that you would marry someone else. Again."Kormak nevertheless challenges Thorvald to a duel. Thorvald is protected from harm by a sorceress named Thordis, and at his mother's instigation Kormak approaches her for the same protection. Thordis struggles because of Thorveig's curse, and tries to unwind it to make the spellcasting easier. Kormak tells her not to worry about that supernatural shit, just give him a magic charm for the duel. He and Thorvald fight, and since neither of them can draw any blood, it doesn't end until Kormak hits Thorvald hard enough to break his ribs. Kormak claims Steingerd as a prize, but she again tells him to piss off and goes to look after Thorvald. Thordis has a magic spell to help heal Thorvald, but he needs the sacrificial bull that Kormak killed after the duel. Kormak's price for the dead bull is Steingerd's gold ring, which pisses her off even more.
"Kormak, will you just piss off?"
Thorvald challenges Kormak to another duel; this time Kormak doesn't bother with Thordis' protection, and ends the duel with a blow that breaks his opponent's shoulder. Thorvard forfeits another gold ring. Kormak continues to harass Steingerd, and is seen kissing her in public, twice. Thorvald demands compensation, and is given the two rings back. Kormak and Thorgils leave town, and take service with the King of Norway.
Later, Steingerd asks to accompany Thorvald on his travels. This brings them into range of Kormak again, who continues to press his attentions on Steingerd. Then Thorvald loses his ships, goods and wife to Viking raiders. When Kormak hears about this he sets off in pursuit, rescuing Steingerd and killing the raiders. Thorvald says that, due to his heroism, perhaps Kormak should take Steingerd with him. Steingerd vehemently refuses. Kormak puts this down to Thorveig's curse, and gallantly says that he doesn't think it would work out.
'It isn't easy, being a poet.'Thorgils' response to this is not recorded, and shortly afterwards, Kormak is killed by Scottish giants, still singing of his love for Steingerd.
And there this saga ends.
Next: A troublesome poet.
Tuesday, 16 December 2014
More Mabinogion: The Miscellaneous Mab II
The Myth: Myths of Wales! Knights! Kings! Faeries! Giants! Princesses! Vaguely Arthurian Imagery!
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
Coming to the end of the Mabinogion. The Peredur tale is a classic Arthurian adventure where a young knight proves himself and wins renown. The Geraint tale is somewhat different: it shows a knight winning renown before falling into dissolution and dishonour. And then there's Taliesin, who's just sparkly and weird and clever.
More Mabinogion: Peredur, the son of Evrawc
Peredur is the last scion of a warlike family: his father and six brothers are dead. Given that their main sources of income are tournaments and war, this isn't all that surprising. Peredur's mother takes her young son to the fringes of civilisation and raises him without any warlike influences at all.
This doesn't take. Young Peredur plays with sticks and staves, chases deer and otherwise displays unsettling martial prowess. When two knights come travelling by, mother tries to tell Peredur that they are angels, but he defeats this cunning subterfuge by actually asking them. Gwalchmai and Owain admit to being knights, and happily demonstrate all their knightly equipment. Peredur is terribly impressed, and builds himself a knight kit out of sticks, steals his mother's forks, and rides off for Caerlleon and Arthur's court.
At Caerlleon, Peredur is greeted by Kai, Arthur's Master of the Household, and by two dwarfs. The dwarfs hail Peredur as the flower of knighthood; Kai kicks the dwarfs for being clearly stupid, and sends Peredur to prove himself by challenging a rogue knight.
Owain points out that this was pretty dumb. Either cutlery boy is killed, because he's armed with cutlery, and Kai is shamed, or he wins and gains glory, and Kai looks stupid. Owain sets out on behalf of Arthur's court. Peredur, meanwhile, has killed the knight with a fork to the eye. He tells Owain that he's happy to consider himself Arthur's vassal, but he won't come back to court until he's dealt with Kai. Not on his own behalf, you understand, but because of the defenseless dwarfs.
Fair enough, says Owain, and gives him his own horse and armour.
Arthur's response to this is to berate Kai for being a dick, and the Court goes off in pursuit of Peredur to bring him back into the fold.
When they catch up with him, he is lost in reverie, contemplating how very red his beloved's cheeks are. Kai interrupts, and Peredur responds by knocking him off his horse and breaking his shoulder.
There is another short errantry sequence - restoring kingdoms, fighting mythic serpents, conversing with folk who luckily turn out to be pagans - and Peredur becomes a hermit in the desert, at least until he gets bored and goes home. Once he's home his vow of silence is misunderstood, and he finds himself again battling Kai. Kai wounds him in the leg. Gwalchmai berates Kai for beating up the poor dumb kid, and sends Peredur, still anonymous, back to Caerlleon for medical treatment. Peredur distinguishes himself by fighting several rogue knights while the King is still away, dispatching the last as the King's party returns. The King accepts him into his household as the Dumb Youth. Angharad likes the strong, silent type and falls for the Dumb Youth in a big way, but of course as soon as she declares this love, Peredur's vow of silence ends and everyone recognises him again.
Peredur's tale then continues with yet more errantry, grander than before, culminating in Peredur and Gwalchmai avenging Peredur's uncle and cousin by destroying a whole castle's worth of sorceresses.
Thus ends, etc.
More Mabinogion: Geraint, the son of Erbin
The young Geraint oversleeps on the morning of his cousin Arthur's grand hunt, and finds himself riding with Gwenhwyvar. Thus, he is the youth on the spot when the queen's maiden is insulted by the dwarf of an anonymous knight. Geraint decides not to lash out at the dwarf, for honour reasons, but instead follows the knight with the intention of avenging Gwenhwyvar's insult. Geraint takes lodgings with an old man, who turns out to be the former earl, usurped by his nephew. The anonymous knight is the champion of the local tournament and favourite of the young earl. The tournament's prize is a sparrow-hawk for the winner's lady love. The earl provides his old rusted armour and his old but unbroken lance, but points out that Geraint can't enter the tournament without a lady love. No problem, says Geraint, your daughter Enid will do. Geraint wins the fight, and charges the former champion to ride to Caerlleon and apologise to the queen. The young earl is so impressed that he abdicates in favour of Geraint's host. Geraint takes his new lady love back to Caerlleon, where she's a bit of a hit.
Some time afterwards, the ageing earl Erbin petitions Arthur to send his son back home to rule his lands, because he wants to retire. Geraint finds life as a provincial lord lacking in excitement and challenge, and grows bitter and feeble. Enid laments this to him, which he misinterprets as her wanting a younger, sturdier husband. He rides out what he calls a quest, though it's aimless and vague, and makes Enid ride out ahead of him. Several times they are accosted by bandits. Each time, Enid hears the bandits plotting to capture her, and points this out to Geraint. Geraint tells her to stay where she is and risk capture. Geraint then arrives in the nick of time to kill the bandits and steals their horses.
Eventually they come to a castle. The castle's earl assumes that Enid that she is Geraint's captive rather than his wife, and offers to rescue and marry her. Then he becomes insistent: he's going to marry Enid whether she wants it or not. Enid politely refuses, and that night sneaks into Geraint's rooms and encourages him to take his stuff and leave. The earl chases them down, and Geraint fights his twelve knights and the earl himself. They ride off.
On the road, Geraint is challenged by a dwarf knight. They fight, and both are heavily wounded. With some difficulty Geraint is victorious. He grants mercy to the dwarf on the condition that he join him in his so-called quest. The knight - known as Gwiffert Petit, the Little King - agrees, and offers his castle to rest and recuperates. Geraint refuses. Gwiffert berates him for refusing the offer and treating Enid so shabbily, which Geraint ignores.
Next they come across a party of Arthur's knights. Kai doesn't recognise Geraint and, because he's Kai, insults him anyway. Geraint knocks him off his horse. Gwalchmai then proceeds to meet this rogue knight, and they fight. Gwalchmai is getting the better of the exchange when he recognises Geraint. He asks him what his stupid quest is about, and demands he presents himself to Arthur. Geraint tells him to fuck off. Gwalchmai relents, but tells a page to move Arthur's tent nearer to the road. Geraint therefore can't avoid it, and is forced to confront Arthur. Arthur demands that he stay in his pavilion until he is healed. A month later the physicians declare Geraint healed in body, but the king has doubts about his mind. Nevertheless, he allows Geraint to leave, with Enid and Gwiffert.
On the road, the party is attacked by Giants, and Geraint is heavily wounded. A passing Earl hears Enid's cries, and takes them to his castle. As Geraint lies unconscious the Earl presses his attentions upon Enid. When she refuses, he strikes her. Geraint is roused by her scream, and strikes the Earl a mortal blow. Geraint is shocked by Enid's pallor and shamed by the knowledge that he has been the cause of this. They escape the castle and are rescued by Gwiffert, who takes them back to his own castle.
The three travel back to Owain's lands, where Geraint proves his newly-regained honour by defeating a fairy knight. He returns to his own lands, and rules prosperously and honourably from thereon - with due respect and deference to his lady wife.
Thus ends the tale of Geraint, son of Erbin.
More Mabinogion: Taliesin
Taliesin is the son of the sorceress Caridwen-
Actually, it's more complicated than that. Caridwen has two children: an exceedingly beautiful daughter and an exceedingly ugly son (not Taliesin). She is worried that her son will not gain favour at court unless he can display some exceptional merit. Therefore, she spends a year brewing a magic potion of inspiration so that her son can be all-wise and all-knowing. By unfortunate happenstance, Gwion Bach, the servant she has stirring the broth, is accidentally splashed with the only three drops in the whole poisonous brew that contain the actual wisdom. Gwion's first revelation is that Caridwen is going to be very, very upset with him, so he bolts. Caridwen pursues, and they engage in the classic sorcerer's duel. Gwion becomes a hare, Caridwen becomes a greyhound. Gwion becomes a fish, Caridwen an otter. And so on, until Gwion becomes a grain of wheat and Caridwen becomes a hen and eats him.
Caridwen then imprisons Gwion for nine months before releasing him, much reduced. She's unwilling to kill her own (technical) offspring, so instead she puts him in a leather bag and throws him in a river.
The king sends his son, Rhun, to test the virtue of Elphin's wife. Taliesin contrives to disguise a maid as her mistress. Rhun, rather caddishly, gets her drunk and chops off her finger, which has Elphin's signet ring.
The king summons Elphin and confronts him with the finger. Elphin observes that it's a lot larger than his wife's finger, with considerably longer nails. And also, it seems to have been kneading dough. Outraged, the king throws him back in prison and resolves to test the bard.
Anticipating this, Taliesin sneaks into the castle and ensorcells the king's bards, so that they can only wibble their lips and say "blerm, blerm." Then he enters the king's court and sings a long and elaborate song in praise of himself. The king orders his own bards to retort.
"Blerm, blerm." This is not considered a winning verse.
Taliesin continues singing his own praises, then moves on to praising God and insulting the king's bards. The king finally concedes Elphin's point, and releases him. Taliesin then tells Elphin to boast that his horse is faster than any of the kings. Taliesin possibly rigs the race with a magical ruse involving holly sprigs, but more importantly uses the horse race to divine the location of a hoard of buried treasure. This he presents to his foster father in gratitude for raising him, and goes on the join the king's court as his singing prophet and only functional bard.
At this point Lady Guest's manuscript gives out, and so thus ends the tale of Taliesin.
--
So in the end I found the Mab a bit of a slog, and I never quite found the rhythm of it like I did with the Kalevala or the Mort.
On the other hand, it has been pretty fun discovering a recognisable but previously unknown Arthurian tradition: instead of familiar names like Lancelot, Gawaine, Galahad, Tristram, Percival, and Kay, you’ve got folk like Owaine, Gwalchmai, Geraint, Peredur and Kai, who have different but fairly consistent roles throughout the Arthurian tales of the Mab (Owaine is valiant, Gwalchmai is thoughtful and charitable, Kai’s a dick). Arthur’s court is at Caerlleon upon Usk, and his wife is Gwenhwyvar. There’s no suggestion that she’s unfaithful. The adventures involve quests and fights and magic and dwarves and giants and castles all sorts, with only a scant few points in common with, say, Mallory.
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
Coming to the end of the Mabinogion. The Peredur tale is a classic Arthurian adventure where a young knight proves himself and wins renown. The Geraint tale is somewhat different: it shows a knight winning renown before falling into dissolution and dishonour. And then there's Taliesin, who's just sparkly and weird and clever.
More Mabinogion: Peredur, the son of Evrawc
Peredur is the last scion of a warlike family: his father and six brothers are dead. Given that their main sources of income are tournaments and war, this isn't all that surprising. Peredur's mother takes her young son to the fringes of civilisation and raises him without any warlike influences at all.
This doesn't take. Young Peredur plays with sticks and staves, chases deer and otherwise displays unsettling martial prowess. When two knights come travelling by, mother tries to tell Peredur that they are angels, but he defeats this cunning subterfuge by actually asking them. Gwalchmai and Owain admit to being knights, and happily demonstrate all their knightly equipment. Peredur is terribly impressed, and builds himself a knight kit out of sticks, steals his mother's forks, and rides off for Caerlleon and Arthur's court.
At Caerlleon, Peredur is greeted by Kai, Arthur's Master of the Household, and by two dwarfs. The dwarfs hail Peredur as the flower of knighthood; Kai kicks the dwarfs for being clearly stupid, and sends Peredur to prove himself by challenging a rogue knight.
Owain points out that this was pretty dumb. Either cutlery boy is killed, because he's armed with cutlery, and Kai is shamed, or he wins and gains glory, and Kai looks stupid. Owain sets out on behalf of Arthur's court. Peredur, meanwhile, has killed the knight with a fork to the eye. He tells Owain that he's happy to consider himself Arthur's vassal, but he won't come back to court until he's dealt with Kai. Not on his own behalf, you understand, but because of the defenseless dwarfs.
Fair enough, says Owain, and gives him his own horse and armour.
"Good of you, Sir Owain."There follows an errantry sequence, were Peredur fights rogue knights and slays monsters and dispenses justice and saves castles and encounters faeries. Along the way he gets sword lessons and horse training. He meets a damosel named Angharad and falls in love. And whenever he defeats a knight he sends him off to Caerlleon with a message that (a) Peredur fights for Arthur and (b) Kai's a dick.
"Yeah, but mostly I don't want people thinking that Arthur's knights are armed with sticks."
"Can I still use the forks?"
"If you must."
Arthur's response to this is to berate Kai for being a dick, and the Court goes off in pursuit of Peredur to bring him back into the fold.
When they catch up with him, he is lost in reverie, contemplating how very red his beloved's cheeks are. Kai interrupts, and Peredur responds by knocking him off his horse and breaking his shoulder.
"Was he contemplating his beloved, Kai? I bet he was contemplating his beloved."Gwalchmai approaches far more carefully and politely - "I say, sir, do you happen to be contemplating your beloved?" - and Peredur responds more levelly. He is sorry to say that he's not willing to return to Arthur's court without seeing to Kai; Gwalchmai tells him that happily, this has already been taken care of.
"How the hell would I know, Gwalchmai?"
"Did you even ask?"
"Why don't you go and ask?"
"Sire, I see Gwalchmai has valiantly triumphed by being nice. How like him."Peredur returns to Caerlleon, and finds Angharad there. He declares his undying love, but she rejects him. Peredur vows never to talk to another Christian until she recants and accepts his hand, and rides off once more into the wilderness.
"You're a bit of a dick, Kai."
There is another short errantry sequence - restoring kingdoms, fighting mythic serpents, conversing with folk who luckily turn out to be pagans - and Peredur becomes a hermit in the desert, at least until he gets bored and goes home. Once he's home his vow of silence is misunderstood, and he finds himself again battling Kai. Kai wounds him in the leg. Gwalchmai berates Kai for beating up the poor dumb kid, and sends Peredur, still anonymous, back to Caerlleon for medical treatment. Peredur distinguishes himself by fighting several rogue knights while the King is still away, dispatching the last as the King's party returns. The King accepts him into his household as the Dumb Youth. Angharad likes the strong, silent type and falls for the Dumb Youth in a big way, but of course as soon as she declares this love, Peredur's vow of silence ends and everyone recognises him again.
Peredur's tale then continues with yet more errantry, grander than before, culminating in Peredur and Gwalchmai avenging Peredur's uncle and cousin by destroying a whole castle's worth of sorceresses.
Thus ends, etc.
More Mabinogion: Geraint, the son of Erbin
The young Geraint oversleeps on the morning of his cousin Arthur's grand hunt, and finds himself riding with Gwenhwyvar. Thus, he is the youth on the spot when the queen's maiden is insulted by the dwarf of an anonymous knight. Geraint decides not to lash out at the dwarf, for honour reasons, but instead follows the knight with the intention of avenging Gwenhwyvar's insult. Geraint takes lodgings with an old man, who turns out to be the former earl, usurped by his nephew. The anonymous knight is the champion of the local tournament and favourite of the young earl. The tournament's prize is a sparrow-hawk for the winner's lady love. The earl provides his old rusted armour and his old but unbroken lance, but points out that Geraint can't enter the tournament without a lady love. No problem, says Geraint, your daughter Enid will do. Geraint wins the fight, and charges the former champion to ride to Caerlleon and apologise to the queen. The young earl is so impressed that he abdicates in favour of Geraint's host. Geraint takes his new lady love back to Caerlleon, where she's a bit of a hit.
Some time afterwards, the ageing earl Erbin petitions Arthur to send his son back home to rule his lands, because he wants to retire. Geraint finds life as a provincial lord lacking in excitement and challenge, and grows bitter and feeble. Enid laments this to him, which he misinterprets as her wanting a younger, sturdier husband. He rides out what he calls a quest, though it's aimless and vague, and makes Enid ride out ahead of him. Several times they are accosted by bandits. Each time, Enid hears the bandits plotting to capture her, and points this out to Geraint. Geraint tells her to stay where she is and risk capture. Geraint then arrives in the nick of time to kill the bandits and steals their horses.
Eventually they come to a castle. The castle's earl assumes that Enid that she is Geraint's captive rather than his wife, and offers to rescue and marry her. Then he becomes insistent: he's going to marry Enid whether she wants it or not. Enid politely refuses, and that night sneaks into Geraint's rooms and encourages him to take his stuff and leave. The earl chases them down, and Geraint fights his twelve knights and the earl himself. They ride off.
On the road, Geraint is challenged by a dwarf knight. They fight, and both are heavily wounded. With some difficulty Geraint is victorious. He grants mercy to the dwarf on the condition that he join him in his so-called quest. The knight - known as Gwiffert Petit, the Little King - agrees, and offers his castle to rest and recuperates. Geraint refuses. Gwiffert berates him for refusing the offer and treating Enid so shabbily, which Geraint ignores.
Next they come across a party of Arthur's knights. Kai doesn't recognise Geraint and, because he's Kai, insults him anyway. Geraint knocks him off his horse. Gwalchmai then proceeds to meet this rogue knight, and they fight. Gwalchmai is getting the better of the exchange when he recognises Geraint. He asks him what his stupid quest is about, and demands he presents himself to Arthur. Geraint tells him to fuck off. Gwalchmai relents, but tells a page to move Arthur's tent nearer to the road. Geraint therefore can't avoid it, and is forced to confront Arthur. Arthur demands that he stay in his pavilion until he is healed. A month later the physicians declare Geraint healed in body, but the king has doubts about his mind. Nevertheless, he allows Geraint to leave, with Enid and Gwiffert.
On the road, the party is attacked by Giants, and Geraint is heavily wounded. A passing Earl hears Enid's cries, and takes them to his castle. As Geraint lies unconscious the Earl presses his attentions upon Enid. When she refuses, he strikes her. Geraint is roused by her scream, and strikes the Earl a mortal blow. Geraint is shocked by Enid's pallor and shamed by the knowledge that he has been the cause of this. They escape the castle and are rescued by Gwiffert, who takes them back to his own castle.
The three travel back to Owain's lands, where Geraint proves his newly-regained honour by defeating a fairy knight. He returns to his own lands, and rules prosperously and honourably from thereon - with due respect and deference to his lady wife.
Thus ends the tale of Geraint, son of Erbin.
More Mabinogion: Taliesin
Taliesin is the son of the sorceress Caridwen-
Actually, it's more complicated than that. Caridwen has two children: an exceedingly beautiful daughter and an exceedingly ugly son (not Taliesin). She is worried that her son will not gain favour at court unless he can display some exceptional merit. Therefore, she spends a year brewing a magic potion of inspiration so that her son can be all-wise and all-knowing. By unfortunate happenstance, Gwion Bach, the servant she has stirring the broth, is accidentally splashed with the only three drops in the whole poisonous brew that contain the actual wisdom. Gwion's first revelation is that Caridwen is going to be very, very upset with him, so he bolts. Caridwen pursues, and they engage in the classic sorcerer's duel. Gwion becomes a hare, Caridwen becomes a greyhound. Gwion becomes a fish, Caridwen an otter. And so on, until Gwion becomes a grain of wheat and Caridwen becomes a hen and eats him.
Caridwen then imprisons Gwion for nine months before releasing him, much reduced. She's unwilling to kill her own (technical) offspring, so instead she puts him in a leather bag and throws him in a river.
"I'm not sure this is any better."The river runs to a weir that has the property that it always yields a hundred pounds every May eve. The young Elphin, feckless and luckless, is given the task of drawing the weir, because if anyone needs a hundred pounds, he does. At first, Elphin finds nothing and his father assumes that he has destroyed the virtues of the weir, but then he finds the bag. He opens it up and out comes a singing, shining child, which he names Taliesin, "shining brow".
"Shut up, kid."
"What did you find in the weir?"Elphin and his wife adopt Taliesin as their own, and the family prospers under Taliesin's guidance. When the local king, Elphin's uncle, claims that he has the most virtuous wife and the best bards, Elphin comments that his own wife is pretty virtuous, and his own bard is pretty good. When the king hears this, he locks Elphin up until he can prove it.
"I found a bard."
"A hundred pounds worth of bard?"
"More, he says."
"Still, I'd have preferred cash."
The king sends his son, Rhun, to test the virtue of Elphin's wife. Taliesin contrives to disguise a maid as her mistress. Rhun, rather caddishly, gets her drunk and chops off her finger, which has Elphin's signet ring.
The king summons Elphin and confronts him with the finger. Elphin observes that it's a lot larger than his wife's finger, with considerably longer nails. And also, it seems to have been kneading dough. Outraged, the king throws him back in prison and resolves to test the bard.
Anticipating this, Taliesin sneaks into the castle and ensorcells the king's bards, so that they can only wibble their lips and say "blerm, blerm." Then he enters the king's court and sings a long and elaborate song in praise of himself. The king orders his own bards to retort.
"Blerm, blerm." This is not considered a winning verse.
Taliesin continues singing his own praises, then moves on to praising God and insulting the king's bards. The king finally concedes Elphin's point, and releases him. Taliesin then tells Elphin to boast that his horse is faster than any of the kings. Taliesin possibly rigs the race with a magical ruse involving holly sprigs, but more importantly uses the horse race to divine the location of a hoard of buried treasure. This he presents to his foster father in gratitude for raising him, and goes on the join the king's court as his singing prophet and only functional bard.
At this point Lady Guest's manuscript gives out, and so thus ends the tale of Taliesin.
--
So in the end I found the Mab a bit of a slog, and I never quite found the rhythm of it like I did with the Kalevala or the Mort.
On the other hand, it has been pretty fun discovering a recognisable but previously unknown Arthurian tradition: instead of familiar names like Lancelot, Gawaine, Galahad, Tristram, Percival, and Kay, you’ve got folk like Owaine, Gwalchmai, Geraint, Peredur and Kai, who have different but fairly consistent roles throughout the Arthurian tales of the Mab (Owaine is valiant, Gwalchmai is thoughtful and charitable, Kai’s a dick). Arthur’s court is at Caerlleon upon Usk, and his wife is Gwenhwyvar. There’s no suggestion that she’s unfaithful. The adventures involve quests and fights and magic and dwarves and giants and castles all sorts, with only a scant few points in common with, say, Mallory.
I hesitate to recommend, but I certainly note with interest.
Friday, 5 December 2014
More Mabinogion: The Miscellaneous Mab
The Myth: Myths of Wales! Knights! Kings! Faeries! Giants! Princesses! Vaguely Arthurian Imagery!
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
More Mabinogion: The Dream of Macsen Wendig
Basically, the Emperor of Rome dreams he was King of Wales.
More Mabinogion: The Story of Lludd and Llevelys
King Llud of Britain has a problem, or three problems: a tri-partite plague involving the invincible Coranians, who can hear anything that is said of them; an annual shriek that terrifies the populace and scours the land; and provisions that disappear on the very night that they are prepared.
Fortunately, Ludd's brother, King Llevelys of France, knows the causes: magic, dragons, more magic. And he has the solutions: treachery, booze, violence.
The Coranians are allergic to a particular insect, and Llevelys provides a breeding colony. Llud uses it to poison some water. He calls the Coranians to a peace conference, and splashes them to death. Victory!
Buried at the exact geographic centre of England are two dragons, who are fighting for supremacy. Llud measures the length and breadth of the island, and digs up Oxford. The dragons fly out and fight until they are exhausted. Llud catches the plummeting dragons in a cauldron of mead, and secures them in a stone chamber in Snowdon. Victory!
The provisions are being stolen by a mighty magician. Lludd arranges a massive banquet, then heroically stays awake until said magician - a monstrous giant - arrives. Lludd beats the magician into submission, only relenting when he offers fealty and to stop stealing all the food. Victory! Victory! Victory!
Thus ends the story of Lludd and Llevelys.
More Mabinogion: The Dream of Rhonabwy
Honestly I have no idea.
More Mabinogion: The Lady of the Fountain
So King Arthur goes for an afternoon nap, instructing Sir Kai to give everyone mead and meat and for everyone to swap cool adventure stories. Kynon, son of Clydno, demands the mead first, and then goes on to tell his story.
Said giant - who has sovereignity over all the animals of the forest - does indeed give instructions: there's a nearby fountain, with a magic ritual which will summon, in order, a devastating hailstorm, a flock of beautifully singing birds, and a black-clad knight who's pissed off that his lands have been devastated by a hailstorm.
Kynon relates that the ritual did indeed summon these things, and that, sadly, the knight trounced him mightily. Kynon returns to Camelot, stopping only to enjoy the hospitality of the mysterious castle again.
At the end of Kynon's tale, Sir Owain suggests that he might like to go and prove his own awesomeness on this black knight. Kai scoffs, but Gwenhwyvar supports him, and Arthur wakes up in time for dinner.
Owain goes off on the awesomeness quest, and finds things exactly as Kynon described, possibly to his surprise. He gets the same story from the mysterious castle, he meets the same giant, he summons the same devastating hailstorm and meets the same pissed off knight. Owain, however, is more awesome than Kynon, and mortally wounds the black knight, who rides off home. Owain follows, and loses half his horse when the portcullis closes.
Owain is rescued by the maiden Luned, who gives him a ring of invisibility. The guards turn up to deal with the murderer of their lord and master, and find only half a horse. Owain takes up Luned's hospitality, pausing briefly to fall in love with the Countess of the town. Happily, Luned is said Countess' lady-in-waiting, and can arrange a meeting, though she recommends waiting until the Count's funeral arrangements are complete.
Luned pretends to travel to Camelot to seek a new suitor for her lady, but instead hangs out with Owain for a bit, explaining how the fountain thing works and how he's expected to defend it if anyone is stupid enough to do the ritual and tough enough to survive the hailstorm. Owain agrees, and he and the Countess are, eventually, wed.
Some time after, Owain remembers that he does actually have a king, so he heads back to Camelot. He promises to be back in three months.
Three years later, a damsel arrives at Camelot with some pretty harsh words. Owain remembers that he's married and that he's broken his promise, and opts to go mad in the wilderness. Happily, the wilderness he chooses is near enough to his neglected lands that when he collapses, starving and unrecognisable, the Countess directs a maiden to apply a magic balsam to him, if he's not already dead.
The balsam brings Owain to his senses and he spends the next three months in the maiden's company, recovering. Then the day comes that a neighbouring Earl comes to take the Countess' unguarded lands by force. The maiden tells the Countess that she has a knight who needs arms and armour. The Countess provides these, and Owain, incognito, defeats the Earl and delivers him to the Countess in thanks for the balsam.
Owain hears a cry in the wilderness, and, knight-like, rides to the rescue. He finds a lion held hostage by a serpent, and he saves the lion by decapitating the serpent. The lion is grateful and follows him like a puppy. Specifically, a greyhound puppy. The lion was not the source of the cry, however: that was a maiden, imprisoned in a stone vault.
It's Luned! Luned has been sentenced to death for providing bad romantic advice, unless the feckless knight she provided comes to her rescue. Luned explains that she's pretty sure said knight will come to her rescue, as long as he knows what's going on. Owain asks how sure; she says, pretty sure. Except that the execution is the day after tomorrow, so, she says, if you happen to see a dickhead knight called Owain...
Owain nods and leaves her in the vault.
The next day, Owain and the lion kill a giant (he had kidnapped their host's twin sons) and then head off to Luned's prison. Two auburn-haired youths are preparing to throw her on the fire, musing that they really thought that the knight would come and rescue her. Owain challenges them and is winning, until they complain that the agreement was that he would fight them, and there was nothing said about the lion.
Owain ties the lion up in the vault and continues the fight, but his awesomeness isn't quite up to these odds. The lion, distressed, breaks free of the vault and eats Owain's opponents.
Thus ends the Lady of the Fountain bit of the Mabinogion.
Next: More miscellaneous Mab.
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
More Mabinogion: The Dream of Macsen Wendig
Basically, the Emperor of Rome dreams he was King of Wales.
More Mabinogion: The Story of Lludd and Llevelys
King Llud of Britain has a problem, or three problems: a tri-partite plague involving the invincible Coranians, who can hear anything that is said of them; an annual shriek that terrifies the populace and scours the land; and provisions that disappear on the very night that they are prepared.
Fortunately, Ludd's brother, King Llevelys of France, knows the causes: magic, dragons, more magic. And he has the solutions: treachery, booze, violence.
The Coranians are allergic to a particular insect, and Llevelys provides a breeding colony. Llud uses it to poison some water. He calls the Coranians to a peace conference, and splashes them to death. Victory!
Buried at the exact geographic centre of England are two dragons, who are fighting for supremacy. Llud measures the length and breadth of the island, and digs up Oxford. The dragons fly out and fight until they are exhausted. Llud catches the plummeting dragons in a cauldron of mead, and secures them in a stone chamber in Snowdon. Victory!
The provisions are being stolen by a mighty magician. Lludd arranges a massive banquet, then heroically stays awake until said magician - a monstrous giant - arrives. Lludd beats the magician into submission, only relenting when he offers fealty and to stop stealing all the food. Victory! Victory! Victory!
Thus ends the story of Lludd and Llevelys.
More Mabinogion: The Dream of Rhonabwy
Honestly I have no idea.
More Mabinogion: The Lady of the Fountain
So King Arthur goes for an afternoon nap, instructing Sir Kai to give everyone mead and meat and for everyone to swap cool adventure stories. Kynon, son of Clydno, demands the mead first, and then goes on to tell his story.
"So, no shit, there I was..."Kynon begins by reminding everyone how awesome he is, and how he was questing around the land to see if there was anyone who could actually beat him. He'd had no luck (because he's awesome) until he comes across a mysterious castle in foreign lands. The castle has two golden-haired youths, a well-dressed older man, and two dozen damosels.
"...and the important thing about these damosels is that they were so hot...!"The damosels see to his horse, his armour, his bath and his food. They are basically like squires, only hot. Over dinner, Kynon's scrupulously polite host asks him his quest, and when he learns it's all about Kynon's awesomeness, he says that he'd rather not provide advice. Kynon, awesome as he is, presses, and gets instructions: He's to go into the woods and meet a one-eyed, one-footed giant who will provide further instructions.
Said giant - who has sovereignity over all the animals of the forest - does indeed give instructions: there's a nearby fountain, with a magic ritual which will summon, in order, a devastating hailstorm, a flock of beautifully singing birds, and a black-clad knight who's pissed off that his lands have been devastated by a hailstorm.
Kynon relates that the ritual did indeed summon these things, and that, sadly, the knight trounced him mightily. Kynon returns to Camelot, stopping only to enjoy the hospitality of the mysterious castle again.
At the end of Kynon's tale, Sir Owain suggests that he might like to go and prove his own awesomeness on this black knight. Kai scoffs, but Gwenhwyvar supports him, and Arthur wakes up in time for dinner.
Owain goes off on the awesomeness quest, and finds things exactly as Kynon described, possibly to his surprise. He gets the same story from the mysterious castle, he meets the same giant, he summons the same devastating hailstorm and meets the same pissed off knight. Owain, however, is more awesome than Kynon, and mortally wounds the black knight, who rides off home. Owain follows, and loses half his horse when the portcullis closes.
Owain is rescued by the maiden Luned, who gives him a ring of invisibility. The guards turn up to deal with the murderer of their lord and master, and find only half a horse. Owain takes up Luned's hospitality, pausing briefly to fall in love with the Countess of the town. Happily, Luned is said Countess' lady-in-waiting, and can arrange a meeting, though she recommends waiting until the Count's funeral arrangements are complete.
Luned pretends to travel to Camelot to seek a new suitor for her lady, but instead hangs out with Owain for a bit, explaining how the fountain thing works and how he's expected to defend it if anyone is stupid enough to do the ritual and tough enough to survive the hailstorm. Owain agrees, and he and the Countess are, eventually, wed.
Some time after, Owain remembers that he does actually have a king, so he heads back to Camelot. He promises to be back in three months.
Three years later, a damsel arrives at Camelot with some pretty harsh words. Owain remembers that he's married and that he's broken his promise, and opts to go mad in the wilderness. Happily, the wilderness he chooses is near enough to his neglected lands that when he collapses, starving and unrecognisable, the Countess directs a maiden to apply a magic balsam to him, if he's not already dead.
The balsam brings Owain to his senses and he spends the next three months in the maiden's company, recovering. Then the day comes that a neighbouring Earl comes to take the Countess' unguarded lands by force. The maiden tells the Countess that she has a knight who needs arms and armour. The Countess provides these, and Owain, incognito, defeats the Earl and delivers him to the Countess in thanks for the balsam.
Owain hears a cry in the wilderness, and, knight-like, rides to the rescue. He finds a lion held hostage by a serpent, and he saves the lion by decapitating the serpent. The lion is grateful and follows him like a puppy. Specifically, a greyhound puppy. The lion was not the source of the cry, however: that was a maiden, imprisoned in a stone vault.
It's Luned! Luned has been sentenced to death for providing bad romantic advice, unless the feckless knight she provided comes to her rescue. Luned explains that she's pretty sure said knight will come to her rescue, as long as he knows what's going on. Owain asks how sure; she says, pretty sure. Except that the execution is the day after tomorrow, so, she says, if you happen to see a dickhead knight called Owain...
Owain nods and leaves her in the vault.
The next day, Owain and the lion kill a giant (he had kidnapped their host's twin sons) and then head off to Luned's prison. Two auburn-haired youths are preparing to throw her on the fire, musing that they really thought that the knight would come and rescue her. Owain challenges them and is winning, until they complain that the agreement was that he would fight them, and there was nothing said about the lion.
"Lions is cheating!"
"There's two of you!"
"Neither of us is a lion. Technically."
"Fine."
Owain ties the lion up in the vault and continues the fight, but his awesomeness isn't quite up to these odds. The lion, distressed, breaks free of the vault and eats Owain's opponents.
"Pretty sure a lion is knightly weapon. Technically."Owain and Luned head back in triumph to the Lady of the Fountain, and Owain resumes his happy marriage.
"Where have you been?"Owain then discovers that the four and twenty hot maidens have actually been imprisoned in the mysterious castle by the one-eyed, one-footed giant, and proceeds to beat him up with his lion. The giant cries uncle, and promises to run his mysterious castle as a mysterious hospice, and sends the maidens home to Camelot.
"Don't ask."
"I asked."
"Um..."
Thus ends the Lady of the Fountain bit of the Mabinogion.
Next: More miscellaneous Mab.
Tuesday, 2 December 2014
More Mabinogion: Kilhwch, Olwen, and some damn big pigs
The Myth: Myths of Wales! Knights! Kings! Faeries! Giants! Princesses! Vaguely Arthurian Imagery!
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
So there are four books of the Mabinogion, previously discussed, and then several other tales and stories. This one is awesome. It takes the fairy tale trope of the three-fold impossible quest and turns it up to thirty-seven.
More Mabinogion: Kilhwch and Olwen, or the Twrch Trwyth
It starts with Kilhwch, of somewhat complicated parentage but basically King Arthur's nephew, presenting himself at Camelot:
In they end, the knights count the cost, bury the bodies and deliver the goods. They hold down Yspaddeden Penkawr and shave him with the tusk of the boar Yskithyrwyn Penbaedd, and then he's murdered by his aggrieved nephew. Her father's head on a nearby pike, Olwen is wed to Kilhwch, and they all live happily ever after. Except Yspaddeden Penkawr, obviously. He's dead.
Thus ends the tale of Kilhwch and Olwen, or the Twrch Trwyth.
Next: The miscellaneous Mab.
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
So there are four books of the Mabinogion, previously discussed, and then several other tales and stories. This one is awesome. It takes the fairy tale trope of the three-fold impossible quest and turns it up to thirty-seven.
More Mabinogion: Kilhwch and Olwen, or the Twrch Trwyth
It starts with Kilhwch, of somewhat complicated parentage but basically King Arthur's nephew, presenting himself at Camelot:
"King Arthur, I crave a boon!"The haircut is symbolic: you don't need a king for a regular haircut. It's a coming of age thing.
"Who are you? You're pretty hot, so sure! I'll give you anything you want."
"I-"
"Anything you can think of. Anything in the world."
"Thank you, sire-"
"Only, not probably not my ship. I'll need that. Or my mantle. It gets cold in Brittanic Wales."
"Well-"
"Not my sword, Caledvwlch, either. Or Rhongomyant, my lance. Probably need those."
"I wasn't-"
"And I'd have to say no to Wynebgwrthucher, my shield, and my dagger Carnwenhau, for the same reasons."
"Your majesty, I-"
"There's something I'm forgetting."
"That's fine, my-"
"Oh yes! My wife Gwenhwyvar. I need to be clear about this. You all hear that? Not my wife. But anything else, in the world."
"Just wanted a haircut, sire."
"I'll get the golden comb and silver scissors. I love this bit."Kilhwch then asks his boon of Arthur and everyone present, who he calls out by name. For like twenty pages, it's quite remarkable. The boon: he wishes to marry Olwen, daughter of the giant Yspaddeden Penkawr.
"Never heard of her."Arthur sends a bunch of knights with Kilhwch, and they locate the giant in question. Kilhwch makes his request, but it turns out Yspaddeden Penkawr has some conditions.
"Aw."
"But I've got like eleventy twelve knights. We'll work it out."
"Ho there, giant Yspaddeden Penkawr. I seek the hand of your daughter, Olwen."Kilhwch heads back to Camelot and explains the situation. Arthur rallies the court.
"Yeah no. It's prophecised that when she leaves me, I'll die."
"Yeah yeah. It's prophecised that I shall marry her."
"Alright, you can have my daughter on the following conditions. I want you to get some wheat for the wedding. You'll need Govannon son of Don to get all the iron out of that mountain, levelling it, then you'll need Amaethon son of Don to plough it into a field. They'll never help you."
"Piece of piss. Anything else?"
"Amatheon won't be able to plough the field without the dun oxen of Gwlwlyd, which he'll never give you. You'll also need the cursed oxen Nynniaw and Peibaw, good luck with that, and...."
[...]
"...the harp of Teirtu for the music, and some super sweet magic honey, and maybe the bottles of Rhinnon Rhin Barnawd in case someone wants some milk, and also some milk..."
[...]
"...going to need a shave, so I need the tusk of the boar Yskithyrwyn Penbaedd, which must be plucked from his head by Odgar, king of Ireland, and brought to Britain by Gado of North Britain... Are you getting all this?"
"Yeah, yeah. Pretty basic stuff so far."
"You don't want to write it down?"
"I'm good."
"Right, ok, so the blood of the jet-black sorceress, daughter of the pure-white sorceress, who lives on the shores of hell, and you'll need the magic bottles Gwyddolwyd Gorr so it doesn't get cold..."
[...]
"...my daughter's wedding and I should have a haircut, so I'll need the comb and scissors between the ears of the great boar Twrch Trwyth, which you won't be able to track without the Greid, son of Eri's dog Drudwyn, who can't be led except with the leash of Cwrs Cant Ewin, and the collar of Canhastyr Canllaw, and the chain of Kilydd Canhastyr, and anyway the only one that can hunt with this dog is Mabon, son of Modron, who nobody has seen since he was three days old and who may actually be dead..."
[...]
"...more dogs, with a leash plucked from the beard of the bandit king Gaselit the Gwyddelian with wooden tweezers while he's still alive..."
[...]
"...like three more huntsmen, one of them the Gilennhin, king of France, and one of them Gwynn son of Nudd, currently imprisoning devils in Annwvyn, and one is Kynedry Wyllt, who is just like super-awesome..."
[...]
"...and maybe a couple more dogs, and honestly, I don't see how you're going to get any of it without the aid of King Arthur and his entire court."
"Uncle Arthur? He's totally on board."
"Ah."
"Alright, lads, we've got the mythic mother of all scavenger hunts on our hands. Pair off, pick up a list, and scour the lands. Start with the dogs!"This is a big old stand-up knock-down kick-arse scavenger hunt of epic proportions. There's questing, there's international diplomacy, there's bandit fleecing, there's dog-napping, there's theft, there's violence, there's everything.
"And try not to lay waste to Ireland!"And they lay waste to a quarter of Ireland, in an Ireland-spanning running battle with the boar Twrch Trwyth, which only ends when the thing invades Cornwall and they're able to stun it long enough to pinch its headgear.
In they end, the knights count the cost, bury the bodies and deliver the goods. They hold down Yspaddeden Penkawr and shave him with the tusk of the boar Yskithyrwyn Penbaedd, and then he's murdered by his aggrieved nephew. Her father's head on a nearby pike, Olwen is wed to Kilhwch, and they all live happily ever after. Except Yspaddeden Penkawr, obviously. He's dead.
Thus ends the tale of Kilhwch and Olwen, or the Twrch Trwyth.
Next: The miscellaneous Mab.
Wednesday, 19 November 2014
Mabinogion IV: Largely Concerned with Pigs
The Myth: Myths of Wales! Knights! Kings! Faeries! Giants! Princesses! Vaguely Arthurian Imagery!
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
And rounding out the fourth main book of the Mab, we discover the secret origin of pigs and why it's dangerous to stand on the edge of your bath.
Mabinogion IV: Math, son of Mathonwy
So Math, son of Mathonwy can't exist unless his feet are in the lap of a maiden, unless he's actually at war. It's not made at all clear whether this is curse or fetish. Regardless, Gilvaethwy, son of Don and nephew of Math, falls in love with one particular footmaiden, Goewin, and sulks. His brother, Gwydion, offers to help him, by clearing Goewin's lap of feet. Obviously, this means starting a war.
Pryderi, son of Pwyll - refer previous - has been given a herd of wondrous new animals from his friends-and-relations in Annwvyn. These beasts are small and even tastier than oxen, and they go by many names: swine, pigs, hogs and so on.
Depending on your reading of Annwvyn - Lady Guest's footnote has it as "Hades" - this makes pigs magical creatures from fairyland, divine creatures from paradise or demon creatures from hell.
Regardless, Gwydion promises Math he'll get some. He and his party disguise themselves as a bards and sing their way into in Pryderi's court. Gwydion uses his magic to conjure up twelve horses and twelve greyhounds with twelve shields which he offers in trade to Pyderi. He takes possession of the pigs and tells his men to get them back to Math pronto, on account of any moment now those dogs and horses are going to turn back into the fungus he made them from.
Gwydion drives the pigs back to Math as fast as their trotters will carry them, and presents them to court in triumph.
"What are those trumpets?" asks Math.
"That might be Pryderi's vengeful army after the pigs," says Gwydion.
Math rides out to meet Pryderi, leaving his footmaiden in the palace. Gilvaethwy turfs out the other footmaidens but, sinisterly, forces Goewin to remain.
Pryderi attacks but does pretty poorly. He surrenders and offers Math hostages, but on the retreat he can't stop his archers from taking potshots at Math's people, so it's pretty clear the war is still on. He sues Math for peace, offering to duel Gwydion to resolve the dispute, on account of he started it. Math, who never really wanted to go to war over a bunch of magic pigs, agrees.
Alas: Goewin no longer qualifies as a footmaiden, and she denounces Gilvaethywy and Gwydion the second they come in the door. Math compensates her by marrying her and giving her lands, and he sentences Gilvaethywy and Gwydion to spend a year as deer.
At the end of the deer year, the two brothers return with a fawn in tow. Realising that it's his kin, Math adopts it and has it baptised. Then he sentences the brothers to be wild pigs for a year, and sends them out.
At the end of the pig year, they return with a piglet. Math adopts it and has it baptised, and it turns into a little boy. He sentences his nephews to be wolves for a year, and drives them out again.
A year later they're back, with a puppy. Math sighs, adopts it and has it baptised. He declares the brothers crimes expiated, and orders them washed. The three animal brothers go on to be faithful servants of Math, although it's worth noting that the text has only the pig turning into a boy on baptism.
Three years without a footmaiden, Math asks his niece Arianrod if she qualifies. She claims to, but when she steps over Math's magic wand, a baby appears. Arianrod denies all knowledge and in fact pretends not to see this apparent offspring, so Gwydion takes the boy under his wing. Arianrod is not made a footmaiden.
Arianrod continues to disown the boy, and curses him that he will never get a name except one that she gives him. Gwydion disguises him as a shoemaker, and tricks Arianrod into naming him Llew Llaw Gyffes, because he shoots like a lion. Fine, she says, but he won't get any arms or armour unless she gives it to him. Gwydion and Llew disguise themselves as bards, and Gwydion creates the illusion of an imminent army. Just after Arianrod has finished dressing the boy in armour, Gwydion laughs and waves away the illusion.
Fine, says Arianrod, but he'll not marry any woman of any race of this earth.
This stumps Gwydion, so he complains to Math. Math and Gwydion use their sorcery to make the boy a wife out of flowers, and they call her Blodeuwedd. Llew and Blodeuwedd are married.
Blodeuwedd, however, is fickle. She falls in love with a wandering lord, Gronw Pebyr. Gronw offers to bump off her husband, but it turns out that he can only be killed in the most ludicrous of circumstances.
A year later, she has worked it out. "Husband," she says, "that one-foot-on-the-bath, one-foot-on-a-buck thing sounds absolutely ludicrous. Can you demonstrate what it would look like?"
"Sure," says her husband, earning minus seventeen points for good thinking.
Gronw throws his spear and hits Llew on the side. Llew panics and turns into an eagle and flies off. Gronw goes back to the castle and installs himself as lord of the manor, with Blodeuwedd at his side.
Gwydion and Math hear about these goings on, and Gwydion sets out to investigate. For no adequately explained reason, his chosen method of investigation is to follow a pig that leaves its sty in the morning, wanders off who knows where, and comes back just in time for the sty's gate to be closed in the evening.
Sometimes, you've got to follow your hunches. Tthe pig leads him straight to a strangely familiar eagle. Gwydion coaxes it down with song, where it turns into a sick and hungry Llew.
They retire to Math's castle. Math raises an army to take back Llew's own lands, and they take Blodeuwedd captive. For her crimes, Blodeuwedd is sentenced to life as an owl.
At this point, Grolw sends a message saying, I didn't really mean it, it was her fault, she tricked me, please don't kill me. This seems reasonable, and Gwydion asks only one thing: that he be allowed to repeat the blow that turned him into an eagle. Grolw asks if he's allowed a shield. Sure, says Gwydion, so Grolw picks up a huge slab of rock.
Grolw takes up his perch on the bath and the buck, and Llew launches his spear. It goes right through the rock and right through Gronw Pebry. Justice is served, and apparently the rock is still there.
Thus ends this portion of the Mabinogion.
Next: Kilhwch, Olwen, and more pigs.
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
And rounding out the fourth main book of the Mab, we discover the secret origin of pigs and why it's dangerous to stand on the edge of your bath.
Mabinogion IV: Math, son of Mathonwy
So Math, son of Mathonwy can't exist unless his feet are in the lap of a maiden, unless he's actually at war. It's not made at all clear whether this is curse or fetish. Regardless, Gilvaethwy, son of Don and nephew of Math, falls in love with one particular footmaiden, Goewin, and sulks. His brother, Gwydion, offers to help him, by clearing Goewin's lap of feet. Obviously, this means starting a war.
Pryderi, son of Pwyll - refer previous - has been given a herd of wondrous new animals from his friends-and-relations in Annwvyn. These beasts are small and even tastier than oxen, and they go by many names: swine, pigs, hogs and so on.
Depending on your reading of Annwvyn - Lady Guest's footnote has it as "Hades" - this makes pigs magical creatures from fairyland, divine creatures from paradise or demon creatures from hell.
Regardless, Gwydion promises Math he'll get some. He and his party disguise themselves as a bards and sing their way into in Pryderi's court. Gwydion uses his magic to conjure up twelve horses and twelve greyhounds with twelve shields which he offers in trade to Pyderi. He takes possession of the pigs and tells his men to get them back to Math pronto, on account of any moment now those dogs and horses are going to turn back into the fungus he made them from.
Gwydion drives the pigs back to Math as fast as their trotters will carry them, and presents them to court in triumph.
"What are those trumpets?" asks Math.
"That might be Pryderi's vengeful army after the pigs," says Gwydion.
Math rides out to meet Pryderi, leaving his footmaiden in the palace. Gilvaethwy turfs out the other footmaidens but, sinisterly, forces Goewin to remain.
Pryderi attacks but does pretty poorly. He surrenders and offers Math hostages, but on the retreat he can't stop his archers from taking potshots at Math's people, so it's pretty clear the war is still on. He sues Math for peace, offering to duel Gwydion to resolve the dispute, on account of he started it. Math, who never really wanted to go to war over a bunch of magic pigs, agrees.
"So can we get the pigs back?"Gwydion, on account of being a wizard, wins, and Pryderi is slain. With no further use for them, the hostages are released, and Math heads back home to put his feet up.
"No."
"Fair enough."
Alas: Goewin no longer qualifies as a footmaiden, and she denounces Gilvaethywy and Gwydion the second they come in the door. Math compensates her by marrying her and giving her lands, and he sentences Gilvaethywy and Gwydion to spend a year as deer.
At the end of the deer year, the two brothers return with a fawn in tow. Realising that it's his kin, Math adopts it and has it baptised. Then he sentences the brothers to be wild pigs for a year, and sends them out.
At the end of the pig year, they return with a piglet. Math adopts it and has it baptised, and it turns into a little boy. He sentences his nephews to be wolves for a year, and drives them out again.
A year later they're back, with a puppy. Math sighs, adopts it and has it baptised. He declares the brothers crimes expiated, and orders them washed. The three animal brothers go on to be faithful servants of Math, although it's worth noting that the text has only the pig turning into a boy on baptism.
Three years without a footmaiden, Math asks his niece Arianrod if she qualifies. She claims to, but when she steps over Math's magic wand, a baby appears. Arianrod denies all knowledge and in fact pretends not to see this apparent offspring, so Gwydion takes the boy under his wing. Arianrod is not made a footmaiden.
Arianrod continues to disown the boy, and curses him that he will never get a name except one that she gives him. Gwydion disguises him as a shoemaker, and tricks Arianrod into naming him Llew Llaw Gyffes, because he shoots like a lion. Fine, she says, but he won't get any arms or armour unless she gives it to him. Gwydion and Llew disguise themselves as bards, and Gwydion creates the illusion of an imminent army. Just after Arianrod has finished dressing the boy in armour, Gwydion laughs and waves away the illusion.
Fine, says Arianrod, but he'll not marry any woman of any race of this earth.
This stumps Gwydion, so he complains to Math. Math and Gwydion use their sorcery to make the boy a wife out of flowers, and they call her Blodeuwedd. Llew and Blodeuwedd are married.
Blodeuwedd, however, is fickle. She falls in love with a wandering lord, Gronw Pebyr. Gronw offers to bump off her husband, but it turns out that he can only be killed in the most ludicrous of circumstances.
"So, how can you be killed, husband? No reason."So Blodeuwedd explains to Gronw that he needs to prepare a spear that has ritually prepared for a year, and he has to use it to strike Llew Llaws Gyffes while he has one foot on a riverside bath with a thatched roof over it, and the other on a buck. Gronw points out that it seems unlikely that Llew will just happen to be standing with one foot on the bath and one foot on a buck. Good point, says Blodeuwedd.
"Don't worry about it. It's kind of complicated and boring."
"But suppose you one day accidentally find yourself in complicated and boring circumstances, and, I'm literally the only person who can save you? I should know."
"That sounds reasonable."
A year later, she has worked it out. "Husband," she says, "that one-foot-on-the-bath, one-foot-on-a-buck thing sounds absolutely ludicrous. Can you demonstrate what it would look like?"
"Sure," says her husband, earning minus seventeen points for good thinking.
Gronw throws his spear and hits Llew on the side. Llew panics and turns into an eagle and flies off. Gronw goes back to the castle and installs himself as lord of the manor, with Blodeuwedd at his side.
Gwydion and Math hear about these goings on, and Gwydion sets out to investigate. For no adequately explained reason, his chosen method of investigation is to follow a pig that leaves its sty in the morning, wanders off who knows where, and comes back just in time for the sty's gate to be closed in the evening.
Sometimes, you've got to follow your hunches. Tthe pig leads him straight to a strangely familiar eagle. Gwydion coaxes it down with song, where it turns into a sick and hungry Llew.
They retire to Math's castle. Math raises an army to take back Llew's own lands, and they take Blodeuwedd captive. For her crimes, Blodeuwedd is sentenced to life as an owl.
At this point, Grolw sends a message saying, I didn't really mean it, it was her fault, she tricked me, please don't kill me. This seems reasonable, and Gwydion asks only one thing: that he be allowed to repeat the blow that turned him into an eagle. Grolw asks if he's allowed a shield. Sure, says Gwydion, so Grolw picks up a huge slab of rock.
Grolw takes up his perch on the bath and the buck, and Llew launches his spear. It goes right through the rock and right through Gronw Pebry. Justice is served, and apparently the rock is still there.
Thus ends this portion of the Mabinogion.
Next: Kilhwch, Olwen, and more pigs.
Wednesday, 12 November 2014
Mabinogion III: Mice and Manawyddan
The Myth: Myths of Wales! Knights! Kings! Faeries! Giants! Princesses! Vaguely Arthurian Imagery!
The Book: The Mabinogion
The Author: Various bards of the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries.
This text: etext of a 1906 translation by Lady Charlotte Guest
Price: $2.48 (Dover Thrift Editions. There's also a free version at Project Gutenberg, but the stories are in a different order.)
The third bit of the Mab is back in fairly solid fairy tale territory.
Mabinogion III: Manawyddan, son of Lyrr
So the seven heroes from the last story reintegrate back into society, and Manawydden realises to his sorrow that he doesn't actually have a kingdom to call his own. "Never fear," says young Pryderi, "I have my Dad's seven cantrevs of Dyved, plus like a dozen from my wife and some more of Dad's, plus some sort of obscure claim to some lands in the Underworld. You can marry my mum and rule Dyved until like you die or something."
These heroes have spent eighty years in Gwales without ageing, and Rhiannon hasn't, but there are possibilities:
(a) no time has passed in the outside world
(b) Rhiannon, being kind of magical herself, hasn't aged much either, or
(c) Rhiannon is remarkably well-preserved for her hundred or so years.
Pryderi's wife Kicva wasn't in Gwales either.
Whichever it is, Manawyddan thinks it's a good deal, and agrees. Pryderi tells his mum that he has a new dad, and she also agrees. Pointedly.
Everything goes swimmingly to begin with, as Manawyddan and Rhiannon and Pryderi and Kicva perform their feudal duties as the best of friends. But then one day, there comes a thunderous mist, and when the mist lifts, everyone in Dyved is gone.
Welsh Family Dyved takes this in their stride for a couple of years, hunting and scavenging through their lands (it's not looting if you're the Prince), but eventually they get bored and head off to Hereford in Lloegyr, where they set up as saddle makers.
Thing is, though, that although they're terribly good at it, Hereford already has saddle makers. These plot to introduce the clan to certain key aspects of Lloegyr's commercial competition policy by beating them to death. Pryderi is an enthusiastic convert to the cause and proposes a reciprocal fatal beating, but Manawyddan points out that fatal beatings are illegal if you're a craftsman and they might be up for a highly embarrassing prison sentence. The family leaves.
"Oh, come on, Manawyddan. We can take these guys."They try again in a couple more towns, working as shield makers and shoemakers, but in each town they are visited by murderous representatives of the local craftsmen's collectives, and in each town Manawyddan restrains Pryderi from adopting the local industrial negotiation practices. Each town, they leave.
"You want to explain it to the king? He's my cousin, dude. It'd be so embarrassing."
"I'm telling you, these guys have never fought anything bigger than a buckle!"
"No!"
Eventually they find themselves back in Dyved, where they go back to hunting and looting. After about a year of this, they see a white boar and set their hounds on it. The boar runs into a mysterious castle that wasn't there before, and one of the dogs follows it. Pryderi investigates, against Manawyddan's advice.
"That's one spooky castle. Maybe we should, you know, go home."The castle is completely deserted, and Pryderi can't even find the boar or the dog. What he does find is a magic fountain with a golden bowl - but when he picks it up, his hands are frozen to it, his feet are frozen to the stone slab, and he finds himself struck dumb.
"You scared there might be shoemakers in there?"
"It's a bad idea, dude."
"You're not my real dad!"
Manawyddan goes home. Rhiannon is distinctly unimpressed with her husband, and stalks off to rescue her son. She enters the castle, finds Pryderi stuck to the fountain, touches the bowl, and is stuck and dumb herself.
Then the castle disappears.
"Guess I could try shoemaking again."Manawyddan and Kicva go back to Lloegyr, but Manawyddan again struggles to adapt to the local craftsman culture and is again threatened by the militant shoemaker union. Kicva recommends violence, but Manawyddan sells his shoemaking concern, buys several sacks of grain, and they return once more to Dyved.
"Good plan."
Manawyddan sows three crofts with grain, but when the time comes to harvest the first crop, he finds someone has beaten him to it, taking the ears of grain but leaving the stalks. The same thing happens to the second. Kicva recommends a stakeout.
"Unless, you know, you're worried it's a plague of shoemakers."Come midnight, and there's the rumble of an approaching army. Of mice. They climb the stalks and chew off the heads and scamper. Manawyddan wades into battle, but lacking an area effect weapon he's unable to do much more than flail ineffectually at them. He ends up taking a single mouse captive, because it was too slow to run away.
Manawyddan is a Prince and knows how do deal with grain thieves: he sentences the mouse to hang. He is in the process of making a tiny gibbet, when a man in tattered scholar's robes approaches. Manawyddan realises how long it's been since he last saw another person in Dyved as he hears himself lamely explain that he has sentenced a mouse to hang as a grain thief.
The scholar asks that he doesn't. He offers money. Then horses. Then more horses than he can possibly imagine. Manawyddan says that the mouse has been sentenced to hang, and it's damn well going to hang. The scholar asks if there's anything that he wants, at all, ever. Manawyddan muses that he wouldn't mind seeing the curse lifted from Dyved. The scholar agrees, on account of it was him that put it there. He is Llwyd, son of Kilcoed, and was a friend of Gwawl, son of Clud. He is taking unofficial revenge on Rhiannon and Pryderi for the whole badger-in-the-bag thing.
Manawyddan says that he is a duly appointed legal lord of the land, and he has a sentence to carry out. What, he asks, is this mouse to you? The scholar says that it's his wife. His pregnant wife. Who sometimes likes to be a mouse. And could you please put her down, my lord?
Manawyddan drives a hard bargain: restore Dvyd to how it was. And its people. And Rhiannon. And Pryderi. And no sneaky taking revenge later for holding his mousewife to ransom. Llwyd agrees, noting that the last clause was pretty damn clever because he was totally going to take revenge. Only when Rhiannon and Pryderi are back at his side and the land is restored to his satisfaction does he give Llwyd his mouse back. And it turns out that she's pretty cute, when she's returned to human form.
All is once again well in Dvyd.
Thus ends this portion of the Mabinogion.
Next: Largely concerned with pigs.
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